ElmoFromOK not a muppet

It's been a long while since I last had an asthma attack. I had almost forgotten what it feels like to lose your breath. How lack of oxygen effects everything you try to do. You act a little goofy and start to make mistakes. You find yourself skirting the edges of panic. You get frustrated to be surrounded by so much oxygen and unable to get it into your lungs.

It happened at work this morning, and I was not prepared for it. Since I had grown sloppy, I did not have my inhaler with me. At first it was only a tightness in my chest. It was like I had eaten too much food and could not take a deep breath. It was like a strong leather strap someone is slowly pulling tighter and tighter, their knee in my back.

Then you start to feel a rough raspy edge around each breath. You feel the need to cough, hoping to break up enough mucus to breath clearly. Then it starts getting worse as your air passages begin to close down.

As soon as I recognized the symptoms and saw where the pattern was going, I left work and headed home. By the time I got home my head was pounding and I was wheezy. I rushed into my room and grabbed my inhaler, a small strange red device with an inexplicably hard to open cap. After I was able to shake up the little red inhaler and squeeze some harsh chemical salvation into my lungs, things started to calm down. My airways began to slowly open back up.

It was only a very mild attack this morning. It was not like the times as a kid that sent me to the emergency room with terrified parents, but it was still very unpleasant, and exhausting. Trying to force air into your lungs with smaller and smaller tubes is a lot of work. Once I felt better I crashed for a few hours.

It will be days before I am breathing fully again.